Sunday, November 30, 2008

Sometime Dreams Come True

Lif'amim, Chalomot Mitgashmim

Catchy song, handsome and beautiful singer plus great voice.
Harel Moyal, Harel Skaat and Adi Cohen. Three of them are contestant from Israel singing competition(like American Idol). The first singer, Harel Moyal is the winner for second season, follows by 2nd Harel Skaat and 3rd place Adi Cohen.


Wednesday, November 26, 2008

Turn and Twist

Explain bullshit.
This final chance wasted...the anger will be lit
Prepare for the reason you going to be hit
Everything fall...we tore it bit by bit



Monday, November 24, 2008

The Laramie Project

Matthew Shepard (Dec 1, 1976-Oct 12, 1998)

Photo: Gina Van Hoof, San Francisco 1998

Basically, this movie talk about the aftermath of the case of Matthew Shepard that die after being assault, tied to the fence outside Laramie outskirt, beaten brutally and left out in the freezing night. He was found 18 hours later by a local that thought Shepard was a scarecrow. He still breathing but in a very deep coma. Thats how his condition until he died 5 days later. The police officer that rush to the spot where Shepard was tied said she couldn't recognize him because his face was bathe with blood and the only place that seem doesn't have much blood is where his tears flow.

Theres two reason for the crime, one is robbery and another one is "Hate Crime". Its seem the later give more impact then another because Shepard was a gay. He died because being a gay person and because his an easy target. (Shepard only 5'2''...and have small build)

The film focus more on the feedback of the local people in Laramie. What they thought about the case, the 2 suspect, the affect to the small town, hate crime, the hidden truth and the late Matthew Shepard himself based on 200 interview from the local. The casting was so real that you cannot believe that this actually a film recreate based from the real story.

The story flows intelligently from one part to another. From one conversation to another. Theres something to be told in each of every second. From start till the story end.

Personal thought:
I know what I'm gonna say here will cause some issues and sensitivity. But this opinion is not solely based from what I read or watch, but more toward my own personal understanding of the issue. Most of people says to be gay/fag is wrong. Its a sin. Yes...thats correct but its only applies when involve with sex activity. Same goes for normal people, to love the opposite sex is not a sin. You only committed sin when having sex before marriage...and thats what happen to today youth. For me theres nothing wrong to LOVE someone from the same gender as long as you know the limitation. Its not a sin to love somebody, whether a male or female.

For me, as a Muslim, I put my religion above all. I've been struggling with inner conflict as long as I can remember but the only thing that kept me from commit the sin and can make my mind at ease are prayers. I ask forgiveness from God if I had committed any sin, accidentally or not. I always smile doesn't mean I'm happy. I rejected serious relationship from other people* not because I'm dry hearted, but simply because I don't want to hurts someone feeling and I don't want to be hurt back.


Saturday, November 22, 2008

Inner conflict

"Our lives begin to end the day we become silent about things that matter."

Martin Luther King

R.I.P Matthew Shepard (December 1st 1976 - October 12th 1998)

p.s: So it has affected me....


Wednesday, November 19, 2008

There's a hero lies in you

Mariah Carey - Hero
X Factor 2008

Mariah Carey - Hero
1995 (I think so)

Pity to Mariah since she struggling to sing her own song and nearly killed a song that use to be her hits in the 90's. I really hope she take some rest and start coaching back her voice. Its still there but lost the agility and the flexibility of her prime age. But even with her current voice and its limitation, people will still remember for what she has introduce and create, a benchmark in music industries, the voice thats once known to be the greatest in the world and a her career that become legend.

p.s: Mariah co-wrote her song, that what I respect her the most.


Saturday, November 15, 2008


I miss my own room back at home. I hope it still tidy like the day I going back to MMU. If not, then some one looks for trouble. you can see there nothing much or interesting to see inside the room except some common item. poster, no frames on the wall, no plushies, no teddy bear(to hell with it). Only some of my manga and novel collection inside the book shelf, anime CD/DVD original and un-use boxes and bags(point on top of the cupboard). Why the lighting is orange, coz thats how I like my room to be. the way, I'm a very...extremely fussy went it come to my room tidiness. Seriously I can get heat up when any of family member leave behind their cloth, rubbish, foods, hair band or even books inside my room. No...I won't tolerate any excuses.."Terluper nak amik...", "Alaa...tinggal kejap jer". Its a BIG NO.

No computer table...but it feels great to sit on the floor. Familiar with the pic inside the frames? (to DM student) Hehehee~!!

Two beds but only one used(the right one). Another one is spare for UNINVITED guest. At first this was my room alone. But after my first year in MMU, my father "sumbat" another single bed causing limited spaces and the cupboard and study table being push aside(first pic). The reason, my older bro doesn't have any room to stay. He stay in the guest room all this while until when he go to college. His original room was turn into temporary store room. So guess what, I need to sleep with my bro...he smokes a lot, and I can't handle the smell, plus his not a hygienics's person and super lazy. Garghh. I had a fight with father back then and slam the door as hard as I can(luckily not broken) as sign that I'm really not satisfied with this decision. me EMO...yups I'm EMO. Because I can't stay with my bro inside the same room, whenever I have semester holiday and he conquering the room, I will and prefer sleeping inside the temporary store room. At least it still have fan, AC and bathroom.

p.s: Thats my favorite sofa. <3>

Hostel room. Currently I'm live alone...and prefer it to be like this until my final year ends. I know its look "pitiful" and empty but I like it this way. Crowded room just makes my head turn around and uncomfortable. I didn't brought any sleeping pillow from home, only small pillow and small blanket that I use also as my pillow or eye cover and that good enough for me. But then, I think I will buy pillow and appropriate bed cover since I got painful back and neck this few days plus itchiness on my body.

In need of towel hanger.

Computer table...maybe yes maybe not.

Un-use double deck.

Good night everyone. Smile and happy always k.


Wednesday, November 12, 2008

At the edge of the cliff...waiting

Already going through all FYP subject for the first week. Got a long presentation this morning for proposal and everything looks ok...on the surface. Underneath it, there are a lot of problem that need to be settle and find the solution and for sure some of it may become redundant. This trimester is not long...comprising everything within this 8 weeks and I know the tension is rising and its already show during the morning presentation. I myself feel really scarred thinking what will happen for another 7 weeks. There will be a lot of research, book/journal reading, thesis writing, consultation session, etc etc. No more "main-main" or "lengah-lengah" this trimester.

I need to by new printer coz the old one already broken(something got to do with undetected printer head...beyond fix). Here the list of thing that I'm considering of buying:

2)LCD Monitor (the pain carrying CRT to the fifth floor)
3) CPU casing

Estimated my budget and thought of getting printer and change CPU casing first since my current monitor still in a very good condition. Priority goes to printer first.


Sunday, November 9, 2008

The beginning of the END

I remember the morning I woke up on 16 June 2008. It was my official first day of internship in CETAK KPYPJ. I was scare. The first day driving to the office feels like along journey. My heart was beating fast enough to cause meto blackout but I brace my self. Stomach grumbling like an alien trying to fine its way out fromthe abyss. I try broaden my eyes and see the reality that I'm going to start working with this company. I'm scared....really scared. But no one will help me. This is my task, my challenge. I remember when I got my first design job. I took a very deep breath and say to my self..."It will fine...everything will be ok". Close my eyes for few second then start working.
So thats how my first day of internship. But all those happy moment at the office already ended month ago. Its like a blink of an eye. I still remember clearly everything I do in the office on each week. Lot of happy moment, jalan-jalan, makan-makan, gosiping, photography-ing, borak-borak, gotong royong. Makes me sad whenever I think bout it. But now everything is in the past memory.
Tomorrow gonna start Delta Trimester 2 classes. Same like in my first day of internship. But now its different. I don't feel the joy and excitement. I don't feel like studying anymore. I don't wan't tomorrow to come. No...I don't look forward to it. The virus of final year is crawling and creeping through my veins. Eating up all my courage. Right now I only think of going back to JB. Yes...this the begining symptom homesick. It got something to do about the air here. Different....very different. Living near woods and jungle plus near the strait of Johor with living in the middle of the Cyberjaya desert are like comparing cold 100 Plus with Teh panas. I want to be inside my own room and laying down on my bed while reading all of my novel and manga collections.
Please...let this 8 weeks ended as soon as possible.
p.s: My blood pressure is rising while typing this entry. Sob...sob

Saturday, November 8, 2008

Science vs Religion

Tengah browsing video kat Youtube and stumble 2 videos that becoming hot debate between Muslim and penganut agama lain plus some people who doesn't believe with religion. The first video is a video about the greatness of Azan. Video memberitahu bahawa Azan tak pernah berhenti dilaungkan di seluruh dunia. Because of the different time zone. Meaning Azan dilaungkan silih berganti di setiap negeri, negara, benua mengikut waktu solat kawasan tersebut. Kitaran ini berlaku sepanjang tempoh 24 jam non-stop. Then come this one viewer that kept on provoking people with his "sensitive" question. And I guess he was an Atheists because he keep saying that he didn't believe in any religion or the existent of God. Ok, fine that his problem. But the real deal is this fellas insulting Azan by saying its cause sound pollution on earth, Azan is a screaming, disturbing people sleep etc etc. Sure I'm really pissed off and other viewer also enrage by this person comment. Plus he act like he so high and intelligent to an extend of condemning other religion in the world. This person heart already blackened and rotten by his own believe and its beyond repair. By pushing people patient with question like:

1) Proof that God is real and not an Illusion.
2) Al-Quran is the word from God and not human.
3) Proof that Al-Quran is not copy from other holy books.
4) Why Azan need to be repeat 5 times a day? Why can't Muslim remember the praying time and do it without need to Azan. (He even describe Muslim as a people that need to be reminded countless time to do something)
5) Proof that we came from Adam and Hawa(Eve) and not from Charles Darwin theory of ape>human evolution.

Yet again even with many people already reply his question with an accurate answer, he still not satisfied plus asking more ridiculous question. My assumption is this person want people to say he was right and Islam and other religion are wrong. No, the one that wrong from the beginning is him. Not believing the existent of God is wrong. It same like you denied your own existent in this world. Ok he can say its mother nature and its a natural cycle. But then who create the mother nature and govern the cycle of life? Its God Almighty.

You said Muslim is like a beggar because we beg to God 5 times a day during our pray. This shows how small your capability to think. Solat is not about begging but a responsibilities to each Muslim to show respect to their creator and asking for forgiveness for the sins they had committed.

You say why not Muslim people devoted our time 24/7 to God and why must only 5 times a day. In Islam, all the thing that doesn't go against our religion are Ibadah. From doing work at the office till we go to sleep, its all ibadah. Its shown that our devotion toward Allah not only through pray but also through our everyday act.

I just don't know what this kind of person believe in. If a scientific answer he seek then I don't have the answer because science is limited only toward logic and reality, not beyond that.


Friday, November 7, 2008

Ghost and Accident

My friend told me bout this video not long ago...few month maybe. And luckily I stumble on it today while browsing ghost vids in Youtube. Its not that scary or makes you had a heart least not for me. I don't know what language is that...sound like Slavic, but I think its
Portuguese. About the video, either you believe it or not. Any opinion just kept it to yourself. For me...I already physically encounter first hand few times with such paranormal so I guess such event can be possible. As a Muslim, we believe with the existent of devil, demon and also spirits of the dead. Science is not relevant and appropriate enough to answer such phenomena.

p.s: Please don't argue bout this video being edited, fake, acting, hoax, all those nonsense because I learn and do video recording and editing in university. I have my own interpretation on the video.
p.s.s: This video is a remake base from an actual event.


Monday, November 3, 2008

I aged gracefully am I not...?

This entry smell like someone is so proud of himself but actually only just "prasan terlebih" so no need to layan this type of people. But still this "someone" are to good for himself that he want everyone else to know bout it. So he gather up all of his picture and compile it into one big jpeg file and post it here. He want people to know that he already gone through a series of metamorphosis and maybe "facial surgery" making his face never look the same on each picture. See pic below for proof.

p.s: I'm just bored...thats all plus waiting for hostel application reply makes my stomach twistering like flushing the toilet bowl. Please reply A.S.A.P...I don't have anyway to stay this coming semester.


Sunday, November 2, 2008

Strain my leg...hurt my back...

I'm gonna write a semi-long ranting and personal thought here but I do it tomorrow(today) coz my smexy butt demanded me to rest him on the super soft and comfy bed. Plus my perfectly carve backbone aching like I've been humping for 24/7 and the leg are so not in the mood for me to "bersila" on the floor. Anyway...few piccies during my cousin wedding. Damn its tiring.

Edit* I got lazy so I won't rant anything here. You guys doesn't need to go through all those emo save 5-10 minute of your precious life.

My Sibling.
Bib is M.I.A

With Mr.Zaza aka Sex Partner.

Welcoming the guest with the most pleasant smile.

Bride and Groom with his Auntie Auntie pot pet...*thats include my mom...hehhee*